In my last three posts I talked about my hope to be a consecrated virgin. Things are moving as they should be. I’ve been praying a lot and looking into better ways to pray. I met with the vocations director this past Friday. She was nice and gave me good advice. She told me the most important thing to do was to find a spiritual director who will help me figure things out, and to slow the heck down.

Yesterday I helped teach eighth graders about death, which was kind of hard, not because I find the subject depressing or awkward, but because they do. We had to talk about heaven and hell and purgatory, and I guess it’s just a lot for fourteen year old kids to digest. I also finally told Father Patrick about what I’ve been thinking about, so now everyone who needs to know does know–that being my parents, the two priests at my church, and the people who are helping me along. Also, one of my friends knows, but I don’t think I should tell anyone else until I know more what I’m doing.

Anyway, my mosaic still isn’t finished. These things take more time than one might think. I keep reassessing it every time I work on it, which I guess is normal for every art project. I added a design piece, and I have a few to alter. The bottom half of the background is just about finished. The reason it’s taking so long is because I have a lot of small parts in the design that are hard to work around. I’ve also started working on an idea for my next project.

I’m actually hoping to make several mosaics that share a common theme: Who is God? This mosaic is symbolizing the moment of creation: God is our Creator, so the actual design is an abstract representation of the Big Bang, but there’s parts of the design that are meant to show that the Universe was created out of love, and there’s parts of the design that are meant to show that even at this moment, God knows there’s sadness to come.

My next mosaic is going to show God as Savior. I haven’t worked out the design yet, but I think I have to show that to save us, he had to be a victim, a conqueror, and a friend. In this case, I actually do think friendship is the most accurate way to describe it. I’ve got an idea of the materials I want to use, but I think I’m not going to know how to design it until I have the pieces.

My third mosaic is going to represent God as Guide through this life. I have absolutely no idea how I’ll design that one. Probably what I’ll do is look at some motifs from the New Testament, play around with some of my own ideas, and take it from there. I could also use some stuff from other stories I know. I think I’ll also want to use brighter colors for this one because for the mosaic I’m working on now, I’m using somewhat dark materials. That’s actually why I’m replacing a bit of the material I have on this one. The red glass I’m using is too dark, so I got some slightly more orange stuff at the store.

I gave up TV and movies for Lent. It’s actually been fun, and I’m learning a lot. I’m rereading the Harry Potter books, as well as some spiritual stuff, and I started working on a new song. My mom went out, and my dad went to bed early the other night, and I realized just how much time we waste watching TV. A week ago, Tuesday, My friend and I watched more of Once Upon A Time. He freaked out when I told him about my TV fast. What I didn’t know, and what my Godmother informed me of, is that you can break the fast on Sundays, so we’ll just have to make that work until Lent is over. Yesterday I did watch the second half of a documentary called “Everything and Nothing.” It was so confusing that when it was finished I had to take a two-hour nap. I did watch a few hours of Once Upon A Time with my friend last night, too, but I’m being a good puppy.

Incidentally, Easter falls on April sixteenth this year, but my family always goes to the Easter Vigil the night before. My birthday is April fifteenth, which means I’ll be celebrating Christs’ resurrection on my birthday, which is ludicrously epic.

Because in my world guinea pigs can fly!

9 thoughts on “Continued…

  1. Hey, peeps. I totally hear what you’re saying. I guess replying to this is a bit difficult because we have very different viewpoints on this stuff, but I’ll do my best. The way the kids are taught is that they’re told what the Catholic Church has surmised to be true. From eighth to tenth grade they go through a confirmation program. At the end of the program they’re asked “Do/can you believe this?” One of my best friends said “No.” I said “Yes.” Like Judy said, it’s a choice. I believe I have sufficient evidence (a lot of it first-hand evidence) to believe it wholeheartedly. I chose to teach because I think what I believe is important. Take it or leave it, I guess.

    1. i was brought up Catholic, fgp, and our entire religious experience was surrounded by death, since the entire NT is about Christ’s agony and death and rebirth. We thought nothing of having a crucifix on the wall above the bed, or a picture of the sacred heart across the room.
      I know things have changed greatly, and I recall our confirmation was more about coming of age in the church, much the way a bar mitzvah or bas mitzvah is in the Jewish faith. It sounds like it’s gotten more complicated than it was then.

      I do have one question: when you mention becoming a consecrated virgin–is that anything near becoming a nun, or are you a kind of lay nun that way?

      1. To be perfectly honest, I don’t like crucifixes. We have the freaking ugliest one ever in our church. The cross is not the end of the line. I don’t feel like the “story” is about death at all. I feel like it’s really about life. Christians believe Jesus is alive, after all. I’d say something like a lay nun is a good way to describe a Consecrated Virgin. I wouldn’t live in a convent or anything and I would keep my job as a writer. It would give me a lot of freedom to do what God asks me to do, whatever and whenever that might be.

        1. We took it for granted, as a symbol, and the emphasis in the churches was definitely centered around the crucifixion, and to complete the stations of the cross was both exhausting and moving when led by a priest…I agree, there was more to the entire business but that always seemed to be the focus.
          Once I started thinking about the crucifix I realized how grisly it truly was.

          I wish you well on your journey, you seem admirably suited for it at this point…=)

  2. Why on earth would be ‘teaching’ 8th graders about ‘life’ after death? You don’t know anything about it and ‘teaching’ kids your religious views doesn’t improve this knowledge-absent claim one iota. All it does is present a pseudo-answer as if ‘authorized’ by a grown up, by the ‘educators’. That’s plainly teaching under false pretenses unless you introduce the topic as YOUR religious beliefs… based solely on you holding them for absolutely no good reasons other than this is what YOU were taught by another knowledge-vacuous grown-up.

    1. Leave her be, tildeb. It’s her choice, not yours, and she seems comfortable in it, so why should you care? I’m not a fan of her choices either, but the key words are ‘her choices”.

      1. Choice?

        Oh, I have no problem with people – adults – believing whatever. But I do have a problem when people think kit’s simply a matter of personal choice to ‘teach’ woo to kids as if it’s true, as if it’s knowledge-based, as if it’s reasonable, as if it’s fine.

        It’s not.

        In other words, my comment is about putting the students’ welfare first and foremost… something many adults fail to grasp in their desire and righteousness to export their religious beliefs to a vulnerable population under the guise of ‘education’, under the impression that the subject is worthy of being taught, being learned.

        There’s a reason it’s called ‘religious indoctrination’ and I hold the adults who carry this ‘choice’ out for their own interests responsible and accountable for what is their own selfish reasons because that’s what it is. Selfish. Self-centered. And has a cost borne by those subjected to it who don’t have the luxury of ‘choosing’ to be exposed to it. And I think more of us should hold such adults to account or, at the least, criticize them for what amounts to being intentionally deceitful and trying to misrepresent their beliefs as ‘educational’ when all it is is trying to fool children into accepting their ‘teacher’s’ religious beliefs as if knowable and true.

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